When a child loses his parent, they are called an orphan. When a spouse loses her or his partner, they are called a widow or widower. When parents lose their child, there isn’t a word to describe them.
This month recognizes the loss so many parents experience across the United States and around the world. ~Ronald Reagan, 1988
“How many children do you have?” A simple question but it gets me every time. Do I say three but don’t give details? Should I be completely honest but make the person uncomfortable by explaining that one of them is in heaven? Do I just say two even though that feels like a lie? Or when someone comments about how perfectly spaced my children are, do I speak up and say, “Well actually we were going to have a 22 month gap between brother and sister but that didn’t happen…”? No, I just say, “Yup!”, brightly, as if this is exactly what I planned.
There is a club, if you will, of women. It’s not exclusive –in fact it’s far too large a group if you ask me, but it the members list isn’t necessarily public. These women have a special bond, but not through an experience they want to be sharing. They won’t assume they understand exactly what each other is going through, but they still “get it” – the complicated mess of feelings and experiences that follow miscarriage or infant loss. October is Infant Loss Awareness Month, and it also happens to be the month my daughter would be having her first birthday. ~Dana, Dallas Moms Blog Contributor
* * * * *
As October 15th rolls around, we want to honor those mothers who have lost little ones during pregnancy or after birth. While we wish we could link arms with you in person and light a candle for each and every one of you, we’ve created this Memory Wall to serve as a reminder that our children are never forgotten.
On the wall, you’ll find the names and birthdates/due dates of those little ones we will always remember; whether lost during pregnancy or shortly after birth.
If you’d like to add your child to our Forever Loved Memory Wall, simply fill out this Google Form below or email info(at)dallasmomsblog(dot)com and we’ll do our best to add your name within 48 hours. We’ll have a special sidebar image on display throughout the month of October, but this Memory Wall will be left up year round.