It’s time to break up with my MOMS Club. It’s an amicable split, we’ve spent time apart for months. While it’s a little sad to see newer moms and members join and fill in my space, I’ve been busy having one school-aged kiddo, one very energetic preschooler, a part-time job, family and life in general, so to me, it feels like the right time to move on.
Mom clubs aren’t for everyone. Truthfully, if you make two or three really good friends while being a member— that’s a success. It’s almost impossible to waltz your way into a group of strangers and not feel a little out of place. Even the most gregarious of people will have flashbacks to middle school, or feel like they’ve landed in the middle of their worst nightmare. You envision yourself surrounded a new and amazing tribe and it can be pretty disappointing if the first playdates or meet ups don’t deliver (check out fellow DMB contributor Abby’s post about dating other moms if you don’t believe me!).
For the SAHMs and WAHMs who stick it out and keep going to events, the much needed adult interaction is there and it’s rewarding. I’ve always been an active member and even a committee and board member, but now after almost seven years of meet ups and MNO (Moms Night Out—my favorite part of being a member!), and meeting new friends, saying goodbye to old friends, watching my kids outgrow the baby groups, the toddler groups and even the preschool groups, I’ve decided to not renew my membership.
There Are a Few Reasons for My Decision.
- I’m tired of meeting new people. Don’t get me wrong. I am a people person. I love a gathering and bringing new moms together. But, after six years of new members, being a constant playdate host and having the same conversations with potential besties, I’m ready to take a break.
- I’m too busy. When I worked on the weekends or didn’t work at all, being a full-time member/committee member/board member was easy and enjoyable. It gave me something to do, a goal to meet, tasks to complete. Nowadays, I’ve got deadlines, soccer games, family dinners, chores, errands and everything in between. Guess when that stuff gets done? On my non-works days, which are usually the days play dates happen.
- I’ve met my tribe. I can’t stress how important these organizations are for new moms, or moms who have just moved to the area. But now, after almost three years in DFW, I’ve found my tribe. With a busy schedule, I am determined to nurture those relationships instead of constantly trying making new ones. As life moves forward, developing a few good friendships is more important than knowing everyone.
There’s Always Another Opportunity Around the Corner.
It’s been a good run for MOMS and I, but now it’s time to pass the baton. Time for new moms to make new connections, new friends and new memories. Will I ever join again? Maybe. It might be the group that is specific to the area in which I live, so I can meet the parents and kids who’ll make the journey through the same schools as my kids. Once my son hits kindergarten, I plan on being more involved and maybe even volunteering for a long-term role in the PTA. And you never know, I might miss going to playgroups and decide to re-join in a year. One thing I know for certain: The time I spent meeting new members will be now be spent with the members I consider to be friends. And in the end, isn’t that what MOMS club is all about?
Have you ever joined an organization for moms? When did you know it was time to leave the group? Share with us in a Comment below!