I never thought I would end up being a stay-at-home mom. Actually, I never thought about *what* kind of mom I would be. However, nearly a year ago I found myself at home with a brand new baby and suddenly I couldn’t imagine doing anything but take care of her full-time. I am beyond blessed to be able to stay home with my daughter but after about three months of being with her around the clock, I began to yearn for some outside contact.
Thankfully, my neighborhood has lots of moms and the moms groups are very active. Playgroups became my lifeline and I began to look forward to the weekly meetings. I started going when Sofia was four months old and she sat in her carseat and slept the entire time. It was because of the neighborhood playgroups that I started branching out and looking for other places to meet new moms. Staying home can be isolating at times so it’s really great to be able to connect with other like-minded women who happen to have kids.
Are you a stay-at-home mom of color? Then you should check out Mocha Moms. Are you a new mom over 35? How about this amazing group. Do you live in the city? There’s a group for you right here. What if you’re a crunchy mom? Find your tribe right here. There are literally hundreds of groups at the tip of your fingers, er, keyboard.
However, meeting new people can be terrifying. I don’t know about you, but it was hard making friends when I was young, and it’s ten times harder now that I’m older and more set in my ways. But being a mom isn’t easy and you need all the support you can get. So I screwed up my nerve, combed my hair for the first time in weeks and put on something other that spit-up stained yoga pants to make some mom friends.
Here’s what I learned about making mom friends and hopefully it’ll help you the next time you check out a new moms group in the city:
You can never go wrong with compliments. My daughter is my greatest achievement and if you compliment her, we’re already on our way to being best friends. Compliment my spit-up stained yoga pants in a genuine way and I may just cook you dinner.
Laughter is the best medicine. You don’t have to be gifted comedian; that’s the best part about being a mom. You can tell a story about something funny your kid did and they’ll laugh because they completely understand.
Be helpful. If you have a trick to get your child to eat their veggies, share it. If it works for another mom, you’ll be on your way to being *her* best friend.
They’re just as scared of you as you are of them. We are all in this game together. That calm, cool put-together mom sitting across from you was crying her eyes out just last night because she was So. Frickin. Tired. That other mom? The pretty one with the perfect hair? The stars aligned for her and her kid took a long nap on the same day she had somewhere to be. Catch her tomorrow and she’ll be sporting spit-up hair.
Whether you find your support network in your neighborhood, at church or on the internet, get out there, get connected. You never know who is waiting for you to come into their lives!