I think I speak for a lot of parents when I say that I do NOT like potty training.
I honestly would rather go to the dentist every day for two-weeks straight than potty train my toddler. The picture to the right only serves to support my feelings.
Let me point out everything wrong in this photo:
- The potty is in the back of my new car. Nice and sanitary.
- My daughter is eating a sucker while on the potty. Gross. I chose to avoid a tantrum by letting her keep it in the hopes that she would go “pee pee”. Nope, she sat there for 20 minutes and yielded nothing except sticky hands and a wet sucker stick.
- I am sure the people shopping nearby thought I was crazy for crawling in and out of the back of my car.
In celebration of my potty training failures I gathered other parents’ thoughts on the subject. Here is what was shared:
You know you are potty training when…
- You say “pee pee in the potty” about a thousand times a day.
- You will “potty-talk “in front of total strangers including the President if means getting your toddler to go.
- Successes going in the potty are equal to Olympic gold medal wins.
- Your toddler’s once varied and healthy diet now consists of M&M’s.
- When you let your dog out in the backyard to go potty…you let your child out too.
- You carry the new and improved portable potty in your diaper bag or car.
- You and your husband have a full choreographed “pee pee in the potty” dance that you will perform together no matter who else is around.
-
Potty Training Cheer Leader You have a mountain of dollar prizes stashed in your closet.
- You recently borrowed a friend’s carpet shampooer for an “emergency”.
- You buy underwear, sheets, and mattress pads in bulk.
- Your kid refuses to go potty in his diaper so you have to pull over and let him pee pee in a cup.
- Like the mafia, you bribe often and with ease.
- You tell the baby “food is found in the pantry, not the potty”. Yes, THIS happened.
- You are afraid to leave your house…and when you do an accident ALWAYS occurs.
- Your child greets visitors at the front door naked from the waist down.
- The “small load” cycle on your washer is used multiple times a day.
- Some underwear just needs to be tossed in the trash.
- Your legs and arms become firmer from squatting to hover your child over a public toilet.
- You grow accustomed to the potty seat being inches away from your face.
- When you ask the store attendant where they keep their “big girl panties” and get no response.
- When you sing “Happy Birthday” to the #2 EVERY time your toddler goes in the potty because it is kind of birthday…and it is the only way to get him to do it!
- You call, Facetime, text, Facebook, or e-mail the entire family when your toddler goes #2 in the potty for the first time.
- You desperately wish Total Wine and Starbucks delivered.
Potty training can be tough, but I think laughter really is the best coping mechanism!
Want other Mom Funny’s? Check out these posts from Dallas Moms Blog:
20 Easy Ways to Identify the Mother of a Preschooler or Toddler
