The Day My Daughter Asked Me to Stop Wearing Makeup

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I’ve never been much of a makeup person. From the time I was a little girl I remember being frustrated with the length of time my mother spent putting on her makeup in the morning. I remember being impatient that leaving the house in any way, shape, or form, required all that time – only to look like you weren’t wearing makeup in the first place.  Even when I went to college I found it irritating how long it took some of my friends to get ready…all so that every imperfection of their faces were covered up before anyone -even their own friends – saw them. 

But it wasn’t just my friends; in an article at the Daily Mail 80% of women stated that they would wait a full month before letting their significant other see their face without makeup. 68% said they felt naked without any kind of makeup on.

414107_4101853302267_844641419_oAnd yet, though I don’t love wearing a lot of makeup, I have gotten into the habit over the years of using it daily to spruce up my face. Cover up the things about my face that I don’t like. My eyelashes are stick straight, for example, and are the color of my natural haircolor. I’ve joked before that I look a bit like Powder without any sort of mascara on. My face can be splotchy, so I occasionally use coverup around my nose where my skin always seems to be more red. On special occasions, however, I usually don a full face of makeup.

 

I’ve had plenty of times over the years when my now 9 year old has asked me why I don’t wear bright red lipstick or blue eye shadow (She seems particularly drawn to the very brightest of colors), and every time I’ve answered her the same way. “Mommy just doesn’t want to cover up her real face.” I’ve found this to be particularly important as I raise three girls. For me personally, having children who, at a young age, think that people only look right with loads of makeup on seems a bit wrong.

Then one Sunday morning, as I was putting on my minimalist makeup before heading out the door to church it came:

“Mommy, why do you wear makeup?” Uh-oh.

“Well, I like to darken my eyelashes because they’re a bit too light. Do you see how yours are black? I just put mascara on to make mine black like yours.”

“Don’t you like the face God gave you?” How does a 9 year old learn to ask loaded questions??

“Of course I do – I just wear a little bit of makeup, that’s all.” Great, now I sound defensive.

Then, quietly: “I wish you wouldn’t.”

And that, ladies and gentlemen, swiftly put an end to my days of wearing makeup of any sort everyday.

It was like being hit with a lightning bolt. To her young eyes it all made no sense: she thinks I’m beautiful just the way I am, and when she and her sisters see me trying to fix what I think is ugly about myself, these little girls aren’t fooled at all.

How can I blame society for telling my girls that they have to be beautiful, coiffed, and have the perfect body, when every day I am telling them the same thing? Not telling them in words, but telling them by my actions.

It's been a couple of weeks, but I'm finally feeling comfortable in my own skin
It’s been a couple of weeks, but I’m finally feeling comfortable in my own skin

We’ve posted articles here, before, about beauty in all of its forms. Heather has written about not being afraid to embrace your true beauty, and now I see a whole new dimension to going makeup free. In a world where my girls are constantly bombarded by airbrushed images of perfect faces and bodies, I decided to put a stop to it in my household. I now have a son, and even for him I feel that as he grows its important for him to see how unimportant exterior beauty is.

So for the time being I’m going to make sure that the person my little girls and boy look up to more than anyone else, ME, shows them that they don’t need to wear makeup to look beautiful. They’re beautiful just as they are.

Do you feel comfortable showing your real beauty?

Share using the hashtag #DMBRealBeauty! 

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